gayoldzeerust:

breelandwalker:

witchymashedpotatoes:

me: *looks up how to be mysterious*

Me: -offers protips-

  • When waiting in public, read something with a serene look on your face.
  • If possible, make the book something esoteric or philosophical.
  • Always have ready a sly smile and a raised eyebrow.
  • Practice giving people a knowing look when they give you odd ones.
  • Failing that, a smile and a dead-eyed stare work pretty well too.
  • Grin conspiratorially at small children who peek at you.
  • Wear black if you like, but whatever you wear, make it a statement.
  • Maintain confident posture, even when relaxed.
  • Walk in like you own the place but aren’t making a big deal of it
  • Walk out like you’re coming off a stage.
  • Whistle nonsense tunes at birds.
  • Pat trees affectionately and smile at them.
  • Go to movies and cafes by yourself. Make no excuse.
  • Be polite to people but offer no personal details in conversation.
  • Always Keep People Guessing.

Have fun! 🙂

Also

– Go barefoot, after a while it centres you and you learn more about the terrain

– Have pockets like Mary Poppin’s bag, keep an umbrella, book and other bulky stuff that shouldn’t have any right to be in a pocket

– Have something to feed to cats/birds and gain their trust

– Equally have something to delight any small children that talk to you (I used to have these little wooden stars and it without fail cheered up crying toddlers)

– Never talk down to children, they’ll be delighted. 

knucklesandgyros:

mysteryseeker:

jedijenkins:

oblivionsongstress:

onion-souls:

spookyscaryskeletitties:

tarradash:

sparkylurkdragon:

cerastes:

biggest-gaudiest-patronuses:

tropiyas:

“i am a monument to all your sins” is such a fucking raw line for a villain it’s amazing that it came from halo, a modernish video game, and not some classical text or mythos

classic texts have nothing on the crazy people come up with in modern times tbh

“I survived because the fire inside me burned brighter than the fire around me.”

– Joshua Graham, Who Is A Fallout New Vegas NPC, Something Most People Throwing This Quote Around Don’t Realize

“If the world chooses to become my enemy, I will fight like I always have.”

– Shadow the Hedgehog in what is widely considered one of if not the single worst game in the Sonic the Hedgehog franchise

this is the source for this text and it haunts me on a regular basis

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“Pick a god and pray.”

-Fredrick from Fire Emblem Awakening

Huh, it’s almost like art isn’t just fine art…

this is my addition to this ever growing list of raw quotes originating from unexpected sources

mjalti:

seaflying-fliptuna:

enajcosta:

aviculor:

crystalquintessential:

mjalti:

humancoffeegrounds:

mjalti:

do u think that angels having sex with humans was seen as like beastiality in angel-world

do you think that when you reach the gates of heaven they’ll show you this post 

bold of you to presume I can die

Pretty sure they actually answer this in the bible and the answer is yes. The whole ‘Lucifer and the lesser angels want have free will’ part has the ‘angels also wanting to be gendered so they can be with humans’ part in it.

god was kinkshaming satan

God got a virgin pregnant without consent, he can mind his business

She did consent tho, like, that’s a whole thing, I’ve been in masses where the main focus was Mary’s Yes. It didn’t happen without warning, an angel was literally like “hey my pal up there is thinking u should birth his humansona” and she was like “that’d be an honor”

I didn’t claw my way out of hell just to be sent back there by reading the word Humansona,

honeysucklepink:

tchrgleek:

pizzopaps:

flaminggoosememe:

hyrude:

i was in a thrift shop the other day and they were playing the most unsettling variations of normal christmas music, culminating in this rendition of the 12 days of christmas except it was like 12 guys all singing over each other and going “no!” and interrupting the lyrics with random other phrases until they deadass just started singing 5 golden rings to toto’s africa. can anyone confirm that this is a real song and not that i stroked so hard i astral projected into a universe where everything is somehow worse than it is here

https://youtu.be/2Fe11OlMiz8

I remember listening to this in grade school. I am going to go get some Chinese food.

this is what my anxiety attacks sound like

Oh I needed this laugh this evening. Thank you so much.

In case anyone didn’t want to leave Tumblr and just hit “play”